"My life seems pretty complicated. Sometimes I just want to throw a pity party."
I agreed with her. We discussed medication changes, hoping that will improve her coping skills. But honestly, sometimes there's just too much to handle and still feel good about life.
I replied, "The tough part is that it's always easy to find people who seem to have it so much better than you. But if you really look around, there are always people who have it much worse. And the pity party really doesn't help."
This has been my past few weeks. I always joked that when you've lost a child, you should get a GET OUT OF TRAGEDY FREE card, that lasts at least a few years. But of course it doesn't work that way.
There are a couple of big, painful, stressful things going on in my life. Great big sucky things. No, not nearly as sucky as Henry's illness and death. But pretty big and sucky. And I could use a break from big and sucky. I even feel like I deserve one, and I know that I don't deserve anything. But I also know that I don't deserve this.
Yet, there is nothing to be done. Such is life. And the pity parties don't help, in fact, they make me feel like an ass. Who am I to expect a stress-free existence?
Still...Big. Sucky. Not sure what else to say.